Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Passion?

I find myself constantly thinking about my passion. I've always enjoyed being creative. I love drawing, painting, thinking of new ideas, but the opportunity to do this does not exist in my 9-5. I do some creating but life gets in the way. I see many people taking risks, being carefree and following their dreams. I haven't figured out what mine is yet. I sometimes feel like I'm too old to start over.

The first time I remember someone asking me what I wanted to be when I grew up was in 5th grade. My answer was a lawyer. I think I picked it because they made a lot of money and I didn't want to be poor anymore. Then that person replied that it requires a lot of reading. I hated reading at the time so I quickly decided to be a nurse instead. Years later I wanted to be an ophthalmologist. I'm not sure how long that lasted. Then it was architect. I was really excited about this one. Then I found out it was a LOT of math and science. I hated both of them and needless to say I was terrible at them too. This then lead me to interior designer. That was it. My mind was made. I enrolled at a community college part time to get an associates degree in interior design. I loved my classes and I was good at them too. I as so happy. My parents then try to encourage me to pick another major because in Houston it would be hard for a woman of color to find work. They also wanted me to get a full time job with benefits so I could take care of myself. My heart was crushed. I dreamed of going to college and getting a degree like my friends were. I tried one last time by doing a six month program in pharmacy technician. I failed two classes and decided to quit. My parents won. I had a part time job so I asked to become full time. Twelve years later I still work for that company. It has been a blessing in many ways and I have gotten a few promotions, but I still think about art. About being creative.

While writing this post I stop for a brief second and it comes to me. Having my own shop. What's in the shop, you ask. I'm not 100% sure, but it is something I created. Art prints, oil paintings, fabrics, t-shirts, scarves, clothing, jewelry. The possibilities are endless, but that's what I want. I walk by an empty store and I imagine how great the space would be for me. I think I found my dream.

What about you? Did you find yours? Are you living your dream? Please share.

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